Why Most Poker Players Burn Out — And How You Can Avoid It

21 Jun 2025

Intermediate

This material is for medium-skilled players

If you're constantly fighting burnout, lacking motivation, unable to enjoy your accomplishments and feeling worse with the more you do, there's nothing wrong with you. You've just been playing the wrong game. Change the game and all this changes too, and you'll be feeling better and more motivated with each thing you do. In today’s topic we’ll speak about the “burning out” factor in poker.

All right, we're back. Let’s get you some more money, because there’s no point in playing poker if you can’t win as much money as possible. Today I’m talking about one of the ways that you’re preventing yourself from getting as much money as possible — which is that you can’t earn if you can’t stay in the chair, and you can’t keep showing up day after day to play good poker, right?

If you’re always burning out, if you’re always feeling awful, if you’re always feeling unmotivated, if you’re always feeling like what you win is never enough, if you don’t feel good when you’re winning, and losing feels like the worst thing ever — and the more you play, the worse you feel — you’re not going to stay in the chair. You’re going to have to quit playing or take really long breaks, and you’re not going to be able to play enough to win what you want to win.

So I’m going to tell you now the ways that I have found, with my clients, that you are stopping yourself from being able to feel good while playing — so that your motivation keeps taking you further and further in the direction of crushing and wanting to play more. Instead, you’re holding yourself back. 

So we’re going to cover this. It’s called dirty fuel. This is the one thing that I think, if you can make this leap, your relationship to poker will change completely. It will go back to the way it was in the beginning, where every day — no matter what happened — it felt amazing.

I’m going to cover this starting with the idea that two things are true. One is that if you want something done — whether it’s to study, to play, to win a million dollars, or to win a poker tournament, whatever — you need fuel. Without fuel to motivate yourself, you’re never going to do anything, and then you’re not going to get what you want.

Two, most people are not going to just sit there and do nothing, because we want what we want and it excites us. So instead, in the absence of a way to motivate ourselves that feels good the more we do it, we settle for motivating ourselves in ways that make us feel worse the more we do it — because anything is better than nothing. I’d rather pay the bills. I’d rather make the money. I’d rather put the trophies on my shelf than not. And so when you don’t have any other alternatives, this is better than nothing.

And so this is what everybody ends up doing — because nobody else has ever specifically been teaching people how to create a motivation system that actually makes you feel better the more you do it... until now. Because this is what we’re going to cover.

That’s the gist of it, right? It’s a very predictable life cycle of a poker player. At the beginning, when you first start to play, it’s just amazing, amazing, amazing — and you’re motivated. You’re feeling creative, inspired, excited each day to go play, study, and learn.

So I came up with seven major ways that people are fueling themselves with what I call dirty fuel — where the more you do, the more you burn out, and you can’t enjoy your success. I’m going to go over that.

But first, I need you to understand that there’s a big difference between achievement and success. Achievement is just getting stuff done — accomplishing things like winning a million dollars playing poker, winning a tournament, becoming the best player in your game. Those are achievements.

So it’s a much higher bar. Almost nobody is truly successful under that definition — because instead of feeling good, more energized, and more motivated the more they do, they’re feeling worse, more burdened, and more burned out. 

And if that’s what you’re doing, you are not actually successful. You’re just exchanging — exchanging your happiness, your well-being, your energy, your relationships — to achieve. I don’t want that for you — because in the long run, that means you end up achieving far less, while being miserable the whole time. You won’t enjoy your success anyway.

So, let’s go over the seven major ways that many of you are motivating yourselves with what I call dirty fuel.

1. Proving something to others

If you tend to motivate yourself, if you get excited to take action, because you want to prove something to somebody else. That’s dirty fuel. Here’s some examples:

• “I want to show the world how great I am. That motivates me into action”.
• “I want to show my parents, my family, my neighbor, anyone. I want to prove it to them so they can see”. 

If that excites you and gets you moving, that’s one.

2. Proving something to yourself

A slightly different version — when you’re saying things like:

“I’m not deserving of this yet. I need to show myself that I deserve it... that I’m good enough... that I’m worthy”.

If that’s driving you, it’s also dirty fuel.

3. Thriving under obstacles

If you do really well, if you really thrive, only when obstacles are in your way, when situations are difficult... that’s another form of dirty fuel.

4. Back against the wall

Poker players especially love this one:

“My back’s against the wall. If I don’t win now, I’m completely screwed”.

That pressure can drive you — but it’s dirty fuel.

5. Reaching your full potential

When you say: “I just want to reach my full potential”, and that motivates you into action, that too is a version of dirty fuel.

6. Doing it for others

If you tell yourself: “I love doing this for other people. I want to be the one that others can depend on”, and that gets you moving — again, dirty fuel.

7. Wanting to be the best

A very common one for poker players, especially high achievers:

“I want to be the best. I want to beat this person. I want to be the best in the world. I want to be the best one in my game”. If that’s what’s driving you — this is also dirty fuel.

If you’re doing any of these — I’m going to show you why this is a problem, and we’ll talk about how to fix it.

So you might be thinking:

• “What’s wrong with wanting to be the best?”.
• “What’s wrong with wanting to reach my full potential?”.

Here’s the problem: If these are the only ways you motivate yourself into action — you’ve got a big problem. Because you never actually get to enjoy the very thing that motivates you.

Let’s say your thing is:

“I want to be the best. I want to beat this person. I want to be number one in the game. I want to be the best in the world”. And that idea gets you up in the morning.

You’re fired up: “I’m going to do it”. It pushes you to study, to put in the hours, to go harder than you otherwise would. And then — one day — you get there. You are the best. You can clearly see: “I’ve surpassed this guy”. Amazing, right?

Except… you just lost your motivation. Why? Because the best player in the world has no one ahead of them. And if your whole system relies on having someone above you to chase — your fuel is gone. Your inspiration is gone.

And what happens then:

• You start sabotaging yourself.
• You stop working.
• You get bored.
• You lose interest in doing all the things you were doing at a high level.

And suddenly, it starts all over again: “I’m gonna beat this guy”. You go hard. You push again. And again — you become the best. And once again — you lose all direction. You don’t know what to do with yourself anymore, because your whole system depends on having someone better than you to chase. But your motivation was: “I want to be the best”.

Can you see the problem here? You either can’t enjoy being the best, or — more likely — both: You can’t enjoy being the best. And the moment you are the best — you have no fuel left to continue being the best… until someone is better than you again. So you never get to actually enjoy the thing you’re chasing.

And this applies to every single one of those “dirty fuel” sources I mentioned. I won’t go over all of them now — but here are a couple more examples: First is the “Back Against the Wall” player — that type who plays their absolute best when their back is against the wall: “If I don’t win now, I’m screwed”. 

That’s when they suddenly get serious — they study, put in the hours, play their best. They climb out of the hole. They reach a comfortable level again… and then? No more fuel. So what happens next? They start bleeding it back — play worse, stop working, or stop playing altogether. Why? Because their only fuel was: “If I don’t win now, I’m screwed”. And once that goes away — they have nothing left to drive them.

For example, if your main complaint is: “I’m sick of people not knowing how great I am… sick of people doubting me… sick of people not seeing that I’m great at what I do”. Then guess what? You’re actually dependent on that doubt to fuel your motivation. You need it to be there — or you can’t get yourself moving.

So what happens? You tell yourself: “I’m just going to work and work and play and play — until they see how good I am”. But here’s the catch: You actually need them to doubt you. And the moment people stop doubting you — you stop working. There are so many professional athletes who thrive on this dynamic.

For example — I was watching the US Open final not long ago. Take Novak Djokovic — now the player with the most Grand Slam wins of anyone in history. But people often forget: when Djokovic first came on the scene, everybody loved him. He was this happy, goofy guy. But… he couldn’t quite break through. 

He couldn’t win Grand Slam tournaments. Until — he discovered something:

• He plays better when people root against him.
• He found that when the fans are booing him, when they want him to lose, that’s when he gets this killer edge.

So — he started leaning into it: Trolling the fans, riling them up, soaking in the hate — and turning that into fuel. And that’s how he started winning — and now has more Grand Slams than anyone.

But — there was one particular moment that really stood out: A few years ago — US Open Final.
Djokovic had already won the first three Grand Slams that year. If he won this last one — it would’ve been a historic achievement. Winning all four in a single year — something almost no man has ever done.

And here’s what happened: Because fans are fickle — and people love winners — at this tournament… suddenly everyone loved him. They were giving him standing ovations, showering him with love. And by the time he reached the final — the entire crowd wanted him to win.

And guess what? Djokovic lost — in straight sets — to an opponent he had no business losing to.
Completely smoked. Played one of the worst matches of his career. And I’m convinced — it was because he lost his fuel. Not on purpose — but because chasing something historic — and having the entire crowd on his side — took away the thing that fired him up. He couldn’t tap into that edge — and his performance dropped.

Now — after that match, he fixed it. Got everyone back to hating him again — and started winning again. So — “all good”, right? Well — here’s the thing about dirty fuel:

• If you’re skilled with it — it works.
• You will win.
• You will accomplish things.
• You will achieve a lot.

But here’s the devil’s deal:

• You will never be able to stop complaining.
• You will always carry the chip on your shoulder.
• You will never really be at peace.

I’ve seen Djokovic in interviews, still complaining:

“Why does nobody love me? Why don’t I get the same love Federer and Nadal get? I deserve it”. Well, buddy — it’s because you need them to hate you. You still need that fuel to bring out your best. And that’s the trap: Yes — you can get all the trophies, all the wins. But whatever you complain about — you never get to lose that.

It doesn’t matter how much you win — if you’re running on dirty fuel:

• You’ll never rest. You’ll never enjoy it.
• You’ll always be chasing the next piece of fuel.

You’ll never be able to just say: “Yeah — this is awesome. I’m good”.

Here’s the deeper problem. If your fuel is something that actually makes you feel worse:

• Like being doubted by others…
• Like having people surpass you…
• Like doubting yourself…
• Like needing others to need something from you…
• Like knowing you’re not living up to your potential…
• Like having your back against the wall…
• Like needing giant obstacles to fight through…

Can you see the trap? You create stress and negativity — just so you can fuel yourself. And then you suffer from the very thing you created. You can’t live this way — not if you want to play at a high level for a long time. It’s not sustainable.

Now compare this to what I call clean fuel:

• You’re playing from a place of genuine excitement — passion — creativity — inspiration.
• Where the more you do — the better you feel.
• Where working harder energizes you — instead of draining you.

This is where you need to live. How do you get there? You go back to the beginning — back to how you felt in your early relationship with poker (or whatever your craft is). Back when:

• No matter what happened, you could handle the emotions.
• You stayed present with every experience.
• You celebrated every win.
• You acknowledged the pain of losing — but didn’t avoid it.
• You felt the joy of winning — fully.

And this emotional presence created something powerful:

• A celebratory relationship with the game.
• Where — win or lose — you learned something valuable.
• You felt what you felt.
• You stayed connected to the joy of the process.

When you’re in that healthy, “clean fuel” space — you’re not dragging emotional baggage into each new day. Whatever happens — win or lose — you clear it, you move forward. You stay present, grounded. That’s what builds a truly sustainable relationship with the game — where the more you do, the better you feel.

But if you get caught up in dirty fuel, if you need stress and negativity to take action, nothing is ever enough. I’ve literally heard players say — after winning the main event at the World Series of Poker: “It didn’t feel how I thought it would. Now I feel lost”. Think about that — the absolute pinnacle of poker success — leaving someone feeling empty. If that’s possible — it can happen to anyone. Don’t set yourself up for that.

Be on the lookout for the ways you’re fueling yourself with stress:

• Needing obstacles.
• Needing enemies.
• Needing something to prove.
• Needing others to doubt you.

Replace it. Build a celebratory relationship instead:

• Acknowledge every experience.
• Celebrate every step.
• Be present with what you feel.

That’s what sets you up for true success:

• You’ll perform better.
• You’ll sustain it over time.
• And most importantly — you’ll actually enjoy it.

You won’t be chasing the next problem, the next complaint. You’ll simply be able to say: “Yeah — this is good. I’m happy”. If this is something you want to work on with me — reach out. You can find me at pokerwithpresence.com. Or just take this message and use it on your own. Either way — wishing you the best. See you next time!